Valentine’s Day: love or consumerism? For those living with Relationship OCD (ROCD), this is not a question on the top of one’s mind. On Valentine’s Day, ROCD ignites and exacerbates intrusive thoughts that are already present. Intrusive thoughts can be around the “rightness” of the relationship, fear that the relationship will abruptly end, or certain feelings are missing from the relationship, along with other possible uncertainties. Alternatively, Valentine’s Day can find those living with ROCD avoiding the day altogether. So, if you find yourself nodding to this article, you are not alone.
We cannot control the outcome of relationships any more than we can control other drivers’ actions on the road. Just as we tolerate the uncertainty of driving each day, relationships facilitate the vulnerability and uncertainty we can tolerate.
Embracing uncertainty on Valentine’s Day (and every day) is the best course of action. Grab those chocolate hearts (on February 15th when they are on sale), and every time you accept the uncertainty that you might be in the wrong relationship, might not be in love, or any other worrying thought, eat a chocolate heart. You can accept all the worries and uncertainty and continue to eat the yummy treats, knowing you won today’s fight with OCD.
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Our clinicians are OCD and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) specialists. We understand OCD as it manifests in the pediatric and adult populations, families, schools, and the workplace. We utilize ERP to break the cycle of OCD individually and systemically to help you achieve your goals. Read more about our services.